One of the biggest obstacles you may face when trying to make new friends or
just meet new people in general is the fear of not having anything to say well
conversation still makes many people nervous luckily today we will discuss
how you can employ the conversational tactics of filtering threading and the
pratfall effect into your dialogue arsenal the first thing you must
understand about conversations is that moments of silence and awkwardness will
occur from time to time but grasping when they happen can reduce these
uncomfortable pauses in most cases when you feel like you've run out of things
to say to a stranger you haven't actually ran out of ideas but simply you
cannot find any other appropriate topics to discuss with this new acquaintance
this is because we use our an internal filter to gauge the appropriateness of
certain conversational topics based on who we are talking to this is why you
rarely find yourself without words when amongst friends but knowing what to say
when for example you are at a networking event can be challenging the other issue
stems from wanting to come off as being cool intelligent or sophisticated which
again can leave you trapped without much to say so how do we fix this filtering
issue well actually it's quite simple it just
requires deliberate practice removing the filter test the boundaries of what
you can say and can't say with strangers while ignoring any inclinations you may
have to try and portray yourself in a certain light doing so will allow you to
come across as being more genuine which is a trait value by many the second
tactic you can use to ease the flow of conversation is threading threading is
the branching of conversation in different directions for example your
counterpart could say I worked at a consulting firm in Italy for six months
last year at this point you have many options you can leave the conversation
using what they've just said to talk about consulting business Italy etc
essentially you are talking about what is said and then using it as a starting
point for your next bit of dialogue the beauty of this method is that you can
literally rely on the strategy do you carry you through
hours of conversation eliminating any fear you may have that the discussion
will run dry at this point of the video by using the two tactics mentioned you
will be able to have effortless conversations with little to no awkward
pauses however I want to provide you with one more powerful psychological tip
to ensure your conversational success if you desire to come across as more
likeable and easy to talk to when meeting new acquaintances you should be
using the pratfall effect to your advantage
this effect states that your likability increases if you show weakness through
making mistakes or being imperfect when people see that you're not perfect you
appear more human and relatable whereas someone who is always on point and never
wrong can come off as threatening therefore in being yourself and not
overly trying to impress others you will actually make yourself more likable
which is the key driver in having more enjoyable conversations what I want you
to take out of this video is that running out of things to say in your
conversations should not deter you from trying to meet new people a lot of the
enjoyment we have in life comes from our relationships but starting these
relationships requires conversation therefore by employing these three
tactics previously mentioned you will be sure to have enriching conversations
going forward thanks for watching if you enjoyed this video please comment share
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