okay guys Stefan here from
projectlifemastery.com I've got quite a
few emails here that I want to go
through they've been piling up over the
last few weeks and I decided to take off
the camera and shoot some videos for you
guys to answer them and turn them into
some video blogs that can put up on on
the blog and up on the YouTube channel
so the first question that I want to
answer is from a girl named Teresa and
it's on the topic of what do you do when
you lose that that desire that passion
that motivation or that hunger to really
go after and achieve your goals and
dreams and I think it's something that
everyone can relate to I know I
definitely definitely can and I've got a
good answer for it
but let me first read the email just to
give you guys some context so it says
when I was younger and I first realized
my passions in life I had a deep burning
desire to fulfill them I felt like I was
willing to do whatever it took to make
them happen but as I got older and
started experience life I let those
lost all that desire I still want to
fulfill my goals and dreams but I
realized that I no longer have the
burning desire that once fueled them the
thoughts of one day accomplish them are
there but the feeling is empty I've read
countless books and researched all the
self-help gurus I could find and have
found them all to be consistent with the
fact that desire is a much needed
fundamental component in the pursuit of
achieving ones goals and dreams but
nowhere have I been able to uncover how
to get it back when you lose it so
that's my question to you how do you get
back that burning desire to manifest
your dreams once you've lost it any
insight you can offer would be greatly
welcomed and thanks again for taking the
time to listen so that's a great
question and I can definitely relate to
it my belief is you know when we're
young we were naive we have these goals
these dreams these visions for our lives
but we haven't really experienced life
and we don't really know what we'd have
to go through in order to actually
achieve those goals and dreams we
haven't been through hitting rock bottom
or
or rejection or failure humiliation we
haven't experienced those tests that
life throws at us to really just test us
to see how bad we want it how bad we
really want to achieve this goal or
dream and it's the people that pass
those tests and get through them those
are the ones that prevail those are the
people that succeed and achieve their
goals and dreams whereas the people that
are weak that don't have the right
attitude or mindset when life challenges
them or test them or rejection or
failure comes their way
and and they let that experience beat
them down as you described then what
happens is you end up giving up you end
up losing that confidence in yourself
that that blind you know optimism that
we have everybody has it when we're
young you know this just this faith that
we believe that we can achieve anything
or make anything happen and really what
it comes down to is your mindset and you
can't let those experiences of your life
affect you you can't let the outside
ruled your environment of what happens
change your beliefs about who you are
and what you're capable of
and if you take two people you know one
person that's successful the other
person that isn't successful you know
one person achieves all their goals and
dreams they take massive action they
they make things happen and the person
that is just struggling or has a
mediocre life or is always coming up
short
both of those people had a goal a dream
of vision they both went on that pursuit
of that goal or dream or vision and they
both face rejection failure all those
negative obstacles that show up the
difference between the person that's
successful and the person that isn't is
the fact that they did not let those
things stop them in fact the difference
between the person that's successful in
the one that isn't is the person that is
successful they don't view failure
rejection
all that pain they don't view those as
negative things in fact they don't even
see it as failure they don't even see it
as rejection they look at it as a
learning experience I look at it as an
asset to help them moving forward right
so that's a difference in attitude
that's a different difference in mindset
whereas the person that experiences the
failure the pain the rejection and they
associate a different meaning to it that
you know it's not working or I'm not
good enough or it's not possible or I
can't do this if they take that take
those experiences and attach that
negative meaning to it then they're
going to become immobilized and they're
going to go back to where they were and
they're going to kind of hide in their
cave or whatever because they experience
that pain and the chances of them trying
again or going after that result our
goal isn't going to happen because now
they associate pain to it they see it as
as something that they want but they are
afraid to go through that rejection or
that pain or the failure all over again
to achieve it because they're still
living in the past and there's a great
saying by Tony Robbins which I love
which is that the past does not equal
the future so how do you change that how
do you change your attitude mindset and
I think for me there's a few core
beliefs that have really helped me
succeed moving forward because I faced a
shitload of adversity of turmoil in fact
I've got a great video that I put up
last year on how to deal with adversity
and during that time net video I was
actually that day going on a trip to
South America for a few months and I had
something happen to my business that
just that just crushed me you know it
just really affected my my finances at
the time affected me emotionally and I
was able to recover from that experience
and I was able to just overcome it over
the next few months and today I'm in a
way better position than it was last
year in fact I've more than doubled how
much I earn
and I have such a better lifestyle and
everything I really took that experience
and instead of having that be a failure
and having that affect me and bring me
down I decided to use that experience as
a way to to to help me moving forward
and I didn't let that experience change
my belief I didn't let that experience
change my confidence my faith of what is
capable of and what I could do and one
of the things I mentioned that video is
the belief that I have which is life
doesn't happen to me but it happens for
me I believe that everything that
happens in your life is a gift
everything you've ever been through has
been a gift as long as you look for it
there's good in every situation no
matter how bad you think it is in fact
for me though the worst times in my life
have been the best times in my life
because if it wasn't for those worst
times the failure the rejection pain
humiliation embarrassment I would have
never gotten the drive the hunger the
passion to really change my life
and do something about it and so
whenever I look at the times when I
failed when I didn't succeed I came up
short I was rejected things didn't work
out it just gave me more Drive and
hunger and it gave me some insights and
lessons that allowed me to really change
my life and you need to start to take
those experiences that you've been
through and use them for your advantage
use them as a benefit don't let those
experiences hold you back or stop you
but rather use them take them take what
you can from them and turn them into
assets that you can use to build your
future and achieve your goals it's a
good saying that when people succeed
they party right they celebrate they
have a good time but when people fail
they ponder and it's very rare that
people change their lives at a party
when they're celebrating when things are
going well but when they fail when they
hit rock bottom
that's when they ponder that's when they
look at things in a different way they
come up with insights lessons and they
they use that to change their lives and
create a new life
so when I look back the last year I had
a few moments that I hit rock bottom in
my business those are the best things
that happened to me because if it wasn't
for those moments I would not be where I
am today I wouldn't be where I am in my
business but more importantly I wouldn't
be Who I am as a person as a character
and as a man and for me when I go
through those experiences and I overcome
them it gives me more confidence it
gives me more belief it gives me more
faith that I can get through anything it
makes you stronger you know it's like
going to the gym you know if you just do
things that are easy you're not going to
grow you're not going to get stronger
you're not you're not going to get fit
it's by doing the things that are
difficult you build a MOT you build
muscle and when you face failure or pain
rejection that's the equivalent to
building emotional muscles as long as
you overcome it as long as you push past
it so to answer your question you know I
gave you some some beliefs that I've use
that really helped me and you really got
to change your mindset about what you've
been through but the reason why you have
these goals and dreams but you're not
taking action is because you have what
are called inner conflicts and inner
conflict is when you want something you
know it's going to be pleasurable and
it's a desire it's a goal a dream that
you have but there's another part of you
that's holding you back and so you're
being pulled in one direction but be
pulled by the fear the pain everything
you're out to go through in order to
achieve it
and the reason why you're not achieving
it is now you've begun to associate pain
to the process or the pursuit of
achieving those goals and dreams and the
reason is is because you've been through
pain before you're basing your future on
the past of times when you came up short
when you failed or you faced rejection
as long as you have those negative
associations that are stopping you and
they're pulling you in this direction
you're never going to make progress you
might take two steps forward but are
going to take two steps back and so you
really need to change those associations
you need to change those things that are
creating that pain and those limiting
beliefs that are stopping you
and change and reframe the way that you
look at them and start to look at them
in a positive way that can bring you
forward in terms of achieving those
goals and dreams here's the truth the
truth is is that you're better today
than you've ever been at any point in
your life you have more wisdom or
experience you've been through different
challenges and you've had some successes
and maybe some failures too but you're a
better person today and every moment
you've ever been through in your life
every failure rejection obstacle all
that stuff has really just prepared you
for this moment right now and your past
does not dictate your future it's what
you do right now what you decide to do
right in this moment and I recommend
that you study and look at people that
have been successful in achieving their
goals and dreams despite the fact of
going through intense failure or
rejection you look at Thomas Edison you
know read his book his biography and
you'll you'll know that he had a goal in
a dream of inventing the light bulb but
he failed I think a thousand times or
10,000 times or something like that and
everyone around him was saying it's not
going to work and this not but he didn't
let it stop him he didn't let those
experiences hold him back
from creating the light bulb creating
electricity and I think there's a good
quote from him which was I am NOT
discouraged because every wrong attempt
discarded is another step forward
you know so he failed you could say he
filled 10,000 times but he doesn't look
at it that way
and he didn't let that that effect his
desire as hunger to go after what he
wanted but one thing you'll find that
they all have in common is a different
mindset a different belief about
themselves and what happens to them and
it's very easy to get excited about
anything that you want you just have to
begin to associate pleasure to whatever
it is that you want you know if you have
a certain goal or dream let's say you
want to start a business if you start
thinking about the pleasure the benefit
what your life would be like the freedom
to travel the ability to make a
difference the growth of who you're
going to become being successful
financially and living in a nice place
and having nice clothes and having this
beautiful car if you actually sit there
for a few minutes and start to think
about that it's very easy to get excited
it's very easy to get that desire to get
that passion to achieve it but the trick
is is getting rid of the pain that you
have as well in terms of achieving it
because there is pain in any process of
achieving any goal out there but the
pleasure has to outweigh the pain if the
pain outweighs the pleasure like this
then there's no chance that you're going
to take action because the pain is more
powerful it's more intense than the
pleasure that you have to achieve it and
so you're going to have to switch that
and you're going to have to start
thinking about the pleasure that you're
going to get by taking action and and
going after your goals and dreams as
opposed to the pain if you do that
you'll get there
so I hope this answers your your
question Theresa
hope this this helps anyone that's
listening to this you get a few more
emails them to get to you in the next
coming videos but other than that I want
to say thanks for watching I'll talk to
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