you
hey guys Stefan here from
stay calm I've got another email here
that want to answer in this video blog
and this one is from Anna and the
subject is hope that she says hit step
in my life is making me feel tired I
the wrong place and I have dreams and
always all of a sudden leave and I feel
like I have no idea where I was
believing in all in all I'm very unhappy
in the cycle of having not enough
friends love money etc I don't know how
it can break out I feel like I'm already
dead like it can't make money I do not
have enough focus and I feel like my
life is already over
yeah I'm not willing to kill myself but
I feel like I'm working there but
there's a lack there I think a loss of
myself I feel like a loser because I
have little money and I can't afford to
go out and so on I don't want to give up
myself I want to live what do you think
how can want to go out of the cycle of
poverty of low income lack of money
thanks for your inspiration Anna you
know first let's when it they say thank
you for the email thanking this for
being open and honest about it you know
there's a lot of people in the same
situation that just didn't have the
courage to reach out and communicate
this and you know I've already replied
to you but I want to make sure that you
know I wanted to do a video blog out of
this because I think a lot of other
other people could benefit from this as
well and you know part of this my
message to use it you know it goes back
to a video blog that I recently did
about the most important decision you're
ever gonna make making your life is what
you decide to focus on you know right
now there's people in the world that
have a lot less than you do they have
worse circumstances or conditions but
they still find a way to be happy and
really what it comes down to is what
they focus on there's people that have
all the money all the wealth everything
that you could ever think would make you
happy but they're still miserable and I
understand it's not your external role
that is causing you to feel this way
it's not the external world it's really
just what you're deciding to focus on
because if you don't change this pattern
and you started to make money you start
to have friends a relationship all the
things here that you mentioned you would
still be unhappy because you still have
the pattern of focusing on what's not in
your life and what's not good enough
you'll still be miserable and so you can
the first step really is just changing
that pattern of focus right now
and the truth is you can be happy right
now you can be fulfilled right now you
can feel grateful right now even though
you don't have a lot of money even
though that you don't have a lot of
friends or anything like that you can
still give all those emotions and still
have a meaning and purpose in your life
and feel really amazing and believe it
or not you know that's that's what's
gonna be able to help you attract the
money attract the friends attract
everything else in your life that you
want is by first changing you and how
you're interpreting the world around you
you know right now just from this email
there's a lot of things you know you're
focusing on this making you feel this
way and going back to that video blog I
posted just a while ago whatever you
focus on you feel whatever you focus on
in your life becomes the experience
whether it's real or not and and this
email you're focusing on the fact that
you don't have money and friends and
love you know your as long as you're
focused on what you don't have then
you're gonna be unhappy but what I find
interesting is you're ignoring all the
things that you do have and there's a
lot of wealth that you already have
right now that you're not even aware of
you're not focusing on it you know
you're not focusing on the fact that you
know you have a computer you know you
actually have email on a computer to
actually reach out to someone and
communicate with them and and ask for
help you know if you think about that
that's something that's not shouldn't be
taken for granted you know you should be
grateful for the fact that you have the
internet something that didn't exist you
know 20 or so years ago and you're able
to reach out to anybody you're able to
communicate with anyone you're able to
access any piece of information just
like that you know a computer this
amazing device that you didn't have to
invent or create or build or figure out
how it works but you could enjoy the
benefits of the fact that you're still
alive the fact that you're healthy the
fact that you have potential that you're
young you know these are all things that
if you focused on them and took the time
to appreciate them you could feel very
wealthy you could feel very happy
very fulfilled and that's a choice that
you make and what's happened to you is
that you've gotten into a pattern we've
gotten to just a cycle of just focus on
all the negative things which is why
you're feeling this way and as you
mentioned here you said I feel like my
life is already over and so as long as
you focus on those things and as long as
you continue that habit and pattern then
you're gonna continue to feel that way
and the place to start is you need to
break out of that pattern and you have
to start to recondition yourself and
recondition this habit of focus you know
make sure you watch my morning ritual
video because the morning ritual video
allows you to daily condition yourself
to focus on what's good in your life
despite the fact that there might be so
many things that are horrible right
despite the fact you don't have money
and you don't have friends and all kind
of stuff it's a lot to force yourself to
find what's good and you have to do it
daily and it's only by the act of doing
it daily that eventually will become
ingrained in you I've become automatic
and you won't have to think about
anymore you'll just automatically focus
on what's good and what's positive in
your life so I would say that's the
first place to start is get in the habit
of asking yourself some new questions
that are gonna change your focus to
focus on what you have and what you can
appreciate what you can feel good about
and the first time you do this you're
gonna say hey what am i happy about your
brain is gonna say nothing and you have
to force yourself to you know push
beyond that and still find something you
know I don't even know you and I can
already tell you there's things in your
life that you should be happy about you
know the fact that you're healthy the
fact you have the Internet the fact that
you have a computer the fact that you
know you even have a relationship with
me just on my blog and my videos and
everything you know those are all things
that you could focus on and feel happy
about and and you have to do that every
day yeah every day you just have to get
in the habit of just waking up and
spending a few minutes just to focus on
what's good so that's the first place to
start because I mean you're just in the
habit right now that's just destructive
you know it's not I'm not gonna get any
better and getting a negative momentum
that you know the more you focus on
negative things there just starts to
stack upon you and it gets so unbearable
that you can't you just feel mobilized
and you can't do anything okay so you
just need to start feeling good a little
bit each day and it's not gonna happen
overnight you know it's gonna take time
it's gonna take conditioning because
you've already conditioned yourself for
so many years to focus on the negative
that you know you're gonna have to
rewire yourself after years of that
conditioning so it's gonna take time
that's why it's a process
the next place I would start is with
your body you know I think the bought
your your body is on the best way is
that you can start to develop some pride
and self-esteem and some confidence and
some happiness you know even studies
have shown that just exercising and
taking care of your body you know really
it's different endorphins and they feel
happier and more fulfilled and so
exercise is a really important piece and
and I think that's the next step for you
is just to get in the habit of moving
every day you know I don't know what
your physical condition is but I would
start just by walking you know if you're
already you know way overweight and it's
too much for you to run or jog or
something like that just start with
walking the goal you know you can't be
focused on running like an hour at a
time whatever if you've never run before
you just got to focus on making progress
you know making a little bit of progress
each day over a period of time is gonna
totally change your body and change how
you feel about yourself so I would say
just get into a ritual part of the
morning ritual just exercising every day
take the time just to go for a walk
every day take the time to maybe go for
a little jog take the time just to go to
a gym you know everyday and just watch
what's gonna happen over the next month
two months three months - you're not
only just rubato you but your
self-esteem your happiness and how you
feel about your life so I would say
that's the next place to start and then
the third place is who you surround
yourself with you need to start - you
know you mentioned that you don't have
many friends
and whatnot and you know there's there's
so much support that you can get these
days and there's so many people that can
help you and reach out to you you know
I'm reaching out to you right now just
with this email or with this video and
everything and so it just goes to show
you know it's it can be very easy for
people just to reach out and get help
and advice from people just by emailing
them just like you did but I'd recommend
to find some sort of support circle or
people that are into different
activities that you can be around every
week or every day and build a
relationship and friendship with those
people you know there's a great website
called meetup comm okay meetup comm you
can go on there there's meetups for
everything I think almost all over the
world now you know you can join a meetup
on dating for singles people on cooking
on sewing on computer programming or
whatever it is that you're into you know
pets are investing whatever business you
can join those groups and just show up
at the meeting is every week for these
meetups 4:40 and meet these people
interact with them hang out with them
over a period of time you're gonna
develop friendships with them you're
gonna become friends and then all of a
sudden now you have friends you know so
it's really as simple as that it doesn't
take too much effort these days to
actually make friends it's pretty easy
because there's so many open welcoming
communities that are available to you so
I'd recommend those 3 main things for
you get in the habit of just focusing on
what's good in your life because you
know there's so much that's beautiful
and amazing about your life right now
and you're just not seeing it you're not
focusing on it and if you actually just
start asking those questions and just
train yourself to focus on that you know
that's gonna change everything for you
that's gonna help you make more money
it's gonna help you feel better about
yourself attract a relationship attract
friends in your life and it starts with
you you know if you want things to
change you need to change so I would
start with that and start with the
morning ritual number two would be the
exercise every day you know start off
small slowly make progress you don't
have to do do it perfectly whatever but
just everyday just
your potty and number three is join a
meet-up you know find other people on
meetup groups reach out to people on
Facebook there's so many Facebook groups
that are out there too and there's a lot
of things available there as well and if
you do this as simple as it sounds but
if you are just consistent with it and
you do this every day just for a period
of time your life is going to be totally
different within three to six months you
know you'll be in a totally different
place in your life and one last thing
I'll add to is reading you know just
finding something to feed your mind with
because you're so focused on the
negative you need some positivity in
your life pick up a good book you know
pick up man's search for meaning by
Viktor Frankl pick up Tony Robbins books
or Tony Robbins program you know there's
so many self-help books out there that
are available on the Internet and you
just got to get in the habit of just
reading every day feeding your mind
maybe go to seminars audio programs I
mean we live in a world where everything
is abundant you know you can get your
hands on all this kind of stuff you know
watch my videos of my blogs you know the
more that you just feed your mind with
that stuff it just rewires your whole
level of thinking and your whole mindset
and this is the entire life so that'd be
the fourth thing that I'd add and I
really really hope that this email helps
you but you know that's really the best
advice that I can give you is just to
start small and slowly make progress
each day and like I said within three to
six months your life will be totally
transformed so thank you for the email
thank you for being open and honest
thank you for watching have a great day
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