alright guys let's talk a little bit
about how to attract women or how to
attract men if you're a man right now
watching this and you want to find out
how to attract women in your life or if
you're a woman watching this you want to
find out how to attract men in your life
I'm going to show you guys the secret
I'm going to show you guys the most
important thing that you need to be
focusing on that can allow you to
attract a man or a woman in your life
and I'm gonna make it as simple as
possible because so much of dating has
become so complex people focus on all
the strategies the techniques the
gimmicks what to say the lines the how
to pick someone up the games and they're
focusing on all the wrong things and
that's what most people teach and for me
whenever I pursue something in my life
I'm always obsessing over what's the
most important thing the 90 to focus on
that's gonna bring me the biggest return
what's the 80/20 principle what's the
20% you focus on that everything else
the 80% gets taken care of and so the
most important thing the secret to
attracting a man or woman in your life
is to become attractive that's it but
come attractive and it sounds simple and
it is an attractive means many different
things and it means different things to
different people
what one person might find attractive
someone else finds attractive and I'm
gonna go into that a little bit and how
to become attractive and what I mean in
this video now the problem is most
people they focus on the strategies the
gimmicks what to say and they might be
able to attract someone momentarily but
they're not gonna be able to keep it's
not going to be sustainable and when you
become attractive people are naturally
attracted to you you don't have to go
through and hustle you don't have to
memorize all these lines and games and
tricks and all that sort of stuff to
attract someone because like I said
that's just covering up who you are you
can attract someone momentarily just by
reciting a bunch of lines and humor and
making someone laugh you can attract
them but to keep them attractive it's
going to be based on who you are and
that's what you need to focus on and
improve the most
like I said guys you become attractive
people are naturally attracted to it's
effortless you go up to someone you say
hi my name is Stefan I want to meet you
and you're being yourself because
yourself is someone that that person
would naturally be attracted to now the
problem is most people when they hear
the advice be yourself it doesn't work
they go up they be themselves and the
person's not attracted to them because
themself is something that is not
attractive to other people and what you
want to do by improving yourself it but
by becoming attractive you can then
eventually just be yourself and just
yourself is someone that naturally
attracts people you don't have to like I
said go out there and hustle and and
spend all that work that I know many
people do I have a skill T of it as well
and by the way many of you guys know my
story many of you guys know my
background I got into self-development
at 17 but my goal when I was 17 was to
get a girlfriend right that's the goal
winter 17 to be popular to have
confidence and social skills because I
was very shy and insecure I went on this
journey I learned all his dating stuff
and techniques and gimmicks and I
approached thousands of people and I did
all these things and I made an
incredible transformation and by the
time I was 21 years old I had a roommate
that says Stefan you should start a
coaching business and so I did called
lifestyle transformations my very first
business started doing seminars and
coaching and over five years I coached
thousands of people here in Vancouver
and you know I helped many people change
their life change who they are change
and attract you know women in their life
and many of which admit that are still
you know Merritt met they're women of
their dreams and are married and have
great families and all that sort of
stuff and so I'm sure with you guys
based on my experience on this I've done
it I've been there I've been all through
up into all the dating stuff trust me
you know I've attracted an amazing woman
in my life an amazing girlfriend a very
beautiful person many of you guys know
as well and so the attractiveness is the
most important thing now let me give you
guys an example let's say that Justin
Bieber okay whether you like them or not
we're gonna use them as an example let's
say that Justin Bieber
walked up to a girl at a coffee shop or
on the street or at a nightclub or a bar
and he walks up to a girl it says hi my
name is Justin you know what are you up
to today or I want to meet you or I you
know I was attracted to you I wanted to
come up and say hi okay if Justin Bieber
did that 99% of time it's gonna go well
99% of time the woman's probably gonna
be attracted to him not all because not
all women might be it may or may not be
attracted to Justin but most okay now
why is that you know Justin doesn't have
to have a pickup line he doesn't have to
have a technique he doesn't have to you
try to use humor and all these different
things to attract that woman it's just a
natural thing that happens why is that
well you might say it's because he's
Justin Bieber because he's a celebrity
because he's famous because he's he's
rich and successful because he's
good-looking ah those are all things
that make up attractiveness and as I
mentioned attractive can mean many
different things right attractive
convenient her status which is something
that Justin Bieber obviously has his
status can allow him to naturally
attract people could be his fame it
could be his looks all things that make
someone attractive
now the key and if were to take a step
back for a sec the first step you have
to define what you're attracted to what
you want the man or the woman that you
want you're gonna define that this is
the woman I'm after you know you know if
it's someone who's you know I know a lot
of guys they want a woman who's a
supermodel beautiful fit healthy
intelligent funny charismatic traveled
the world successful spiritual and to
self-development all these different
things and the problem is that they're
not attractive enough to be able to
attract what it is they want because
that woman that I just described is
going to be attracted to a man who's
maybe attractive successful funny all
the similar things healthy and fit and
traveled all those different things as
well right that's what she is naturally
gonna be attracted to you because you
know that's what she is and one of the
most important things I can give you
guys
as that you attract what you are you
attract what you are if right now if you
look at what you're attracting in your
life I understand that's what you're
naturally attracting based on what you
are and who you are and if you want to
attract more if you're not satisfied
with what you're attracting the man or
woman that the caliber the quality
whatever it is then it's because you're
attracting what you are and you need to
improve yourself become more attractive
to attract a higher caliber person in
your life
okay so defining what it is you want you
know what is the woman that you want
what is the man that you want to attract
getting clear on that describing in
detail from looks personality
intelligence experience interests
everything and once you define that the
second question go to ask yourself is
who would that man or woman be attracted
to who are they after who are they
looking for and attracted to and then
your job it's become that become what it
is there a track you know attracted to
so that when you meet those people
they're naturally gonna be attracted to
you again you know you're not gonna have
to try to use all these gimmicks and
tricks and if they're up here and you're
down here not you're not trying to bring
them down or use techniques to get up
there you're just natural in the same
level because you've grown and you've
improved and you're what that person's
attracted to so what does it mean to be
attractive and like I said it's
different based on everything everybody
and what I recommend is that when you
identified this is what you're attracted
to if you can find that man or woman out
there whether that's on social media
whether that's on the internet where
their assets elaborate whatever it is in
your life schoolwork whatever it is you
want to analyze and say okay this is the
woman that I want but the type of woman
or man that I want who are they
attracted to well the best place to find
that out is to look see who they're
dating who are they dating who have they
dated in the past and then go to those
people those men or those women and find
out what is it about them that attracted
that man or woman to them what is it
about them
and analyze it look at it from how do
they look do they work out are they
healthy are they fit are they you know
what's their personality what's their
career what's you know what are all
these different things that you can
identify it because those are all things
that you can use to model and improve
upon within yourself to be able to
attract the man or woman that you're
after so going back what is attractive
many different things it could be your
looks it could be your physical genetics
which unfortunately can't really control
but it could be your physical fitness
you can change their looks you can
improve your looks you can workout you
can lose fat when you're this fat your
your face it's gonna be more chiseled
and you can become more attractive when
you lose fat you could put on muscle
mass you know you can improve your
hygiene you can improve your grooming
you know you can improve your fashion
your style there's much that you can do
to improve your looks and you want to
look at that and say okay you want to
have awareness okay this is Who I am
right now this is what I'm attracting
this is what I want I need to improve my
looks you got to have awareness around
your physical appearance and look at
every part of it how can I improve that
to become more attractive because by
improving your fashion by improving you
know your your grooming and your fitness
and your health all those things that's
gonna allow you to attract a higher
quality person if you're attracted to
someone who is a punk goth person then
probably you gonna dress differently
than you would if you want to attract a
professional man or woman you know or an
athletic sports man or woman right
you're gonna dress you're gonna you know
those different people might be
attracted to totally different things so
that's why you have to define what that
is first so improve your looks
improve it or fashion improve your
fitness or health and now for me
for example I've always you know I'm
attracted to women that are healthy and
fit so I realize I need to become
healthy and fit in order to attract a
woman like that because if I met a woman
who's healthy and fit and I eat at
McDonald's everyday and I don't take
good care of myself and I'm out of shape
she's not gonna be attractive to me
she's attractive the men that are
healthy and fit because she's healthy
and fit right so you attract what you
are you know if you're overweight you
don't take you carry yourself you're
going to try
someone that's like that as well most
likely so improving her looks
how about improving their personality
improving your sense of humor improving
your confidence improving your presence
improving your charisma improving your
ability to tell stories and joke around
and be fun and be interesting your
knowledge those are all things you can
improve you know and if you want to
attract the woman who's intelligent you
have to improve your intelligence
because you meet a woman who's
intelligent and you're a dumbass you
know you're not gonna you're gonna talk
to her she's gonna know right away she's
not gonna be impressed by you at all so
again you got to become attractive and
prove that you know you also have to
improve you know different interests in
your life experiences you know it's
different hobbies maybe it's yoga maybe
it's music maybe it's travel you know
maybe it's becoming more successful
right maybe it's being someone that is
contribution driven adding value for me
my girlfriend is an amazing spirit she's
one of the most contribution driven
people that I know when I met her the
first time I met her she's sharing with
me how she volunteers at an old folks
home how she was going to Brazil to
volunteer for a few months to help kids
and teach them English and stuff like
that incredible I wouldn't have been
able to attract my girlfriend if I also
wasn't contribution driven because
that's what she is attracted to right so
improving that element as well maybe it
is success maybe it is money maybe is
materialistic things that you want to
attract materialistic people you know
like I said you got to define what did
that what is that for you based on what
you want and you got to focus on
yourself improving yourself as much as
possible through self-development
through your life experiences through
every possible way to become that
attractive person and guess what when
you do people naturally attracted to you
it's effortless you don't have to work
at it guys it's something that you just
be yourself and people are attracted to
you and you've got to go on a journey
for that and I wish I can give you a
quick fix the quick fixes don't work
that's what people sell you the quick
fix the pickup line that's going to
allow you to attract the woman in
seconds and bring her home with you
doesn't exist guys I mean those things
they can like work temporarily but
they're not congruent if you're not
attractive and you're expressing that
because what you're saying isn't
congruent with who you are and who you
are speaks much more loudly than what
you say who you are is always shining
through people can tell based on who you
are so become attractive guys that's the
most important thing that's what you
guys should focus on improving yourself
to become the type of man the type of
woman that can naturally attract the man
or woman that you want you know for me
in my journey I did everything that I
could I did public speaking classes and
Toastmasters the improv and acting
classes to improve my confidence I
realized the woman that I want and
you're gonna want someone who's coughing
someone that can speak someone that is a
powerful communicator I realized that I
need to improve my fitness I need to get
in shape I need to become more masculine
that was one thing I was missing but I
was missing this masculine energy you
know inside started doing more Thai and
Jiu Jitsu and learning martial arts and
working out and you know get a little
bit buffer so that I can have more
masculinity to me because I realized
that that would allow me to become more
attractive and attract the woman that I
want I went out there and I approached
thousands of women most of which I got
massively rejected didn't work out short
conversations whatever but I went
thousands and thousands of times I'm not
exaggerating probably over 10,000
approaches that I've done and whenever I
got rejected though I learned that these
were objections or gifts because when a
girl turns you down when I go it doesn't
work out that she hasn't returned her
phone call she's giving you a gift she's
pushing you to become stronger to become
a better person improve herself and
through those experiences through those
failures you become more attractive you
learn not to care you you learn not to
care about rejection you develop more
confidence you grow and you improve
herself and through those experiences
are becoming attractive so that you can
eventually attract the man or woman that
you're meant to attract in your life so
going out there approaching people that
experience you're gonna become more
attractive going on dates they're gonna
learn from that
one thing that honestly helped me a lot
was filming myself you know filming
myself on video just like what I'm doing
right now because there's so many
unconscious behaviors most people are
not even aware of right we're not even
aware of the UM zan Oz that we have and
how we look and how we sound when you
film yourself often times is that it
could be very scary very uncommon first
time I heard myself or saw myself on
camera I was like oh my god is that me
you know I just I was like embarrassed
of myself but the great thing about that
is that brings awareness and you can see
okay that's how I come across okay
that's my mannerisms those are all
things that I can consciously work at
and improve because their body language
says a lot about you as well how you
speak how you talk how you move your eye
contact or voice tone all those things
can also influence how attractive that
you are so you want to look at
everything guys everything as much as
possible you want to have awareness if
you can have a coach if you can have
people in your life and get feedback and
then they can tell you things like I
know people that they want to attract a
woman in their life and they've got a
unibrow and they have horrible hygiene
and they have no grooming whatsoever and
they want to attract this beautiful
person I'm like dude you're not gonna
attract this beautiful man or woman in
your life if you don't wear deodorant
and get rid of the unibrow and at least
clean yourself up and dress a little bit
better and do these things it's just
totally unrealistic right but of course
that person you know he doesn't look at
that he looks at all the techniques and
the gimmicks and the tricks so the
awareness part is key you got to look at
yourself critically and look at what you
can improve on what you need to change
and it doesn't feel good to look at
yourself in that way but you got to be
honest with yourself and look at those
things and get that direct feedback from
people that will tell you you know dude
you're creepy or do you got to improve
this about yourself or that and by
getting that feedback that's what will
allow you to improve and one quote that
I learned from Jim Rohn work harder on
yourself than anything else we're harder
on yourself than under job we're harder
on herself than then women than men
whatever it is work harder on yourself
because if you change everything will
change for you so that's the secret guy
that's what you should be focused on
that's the most important thing if you
guys just took this you didn't learn
anything else about dating or attraction
just took that one thing and you just
did exactly what I said you watch this
video again and again and again you
focus on becoming more attractive it's
gonna change everything for you guys and
that's what I want for you so I wanted
to share this because a lot of people
ask me about this they asked me about
dating and attraction and that's the
most important thing that I share and
people are looking for the technique and
I'm like there's no technique man that's
it become attractive and whatever that
might mean for you whatever that might
mean based on what you're attracted to
what the man or woman that you are after
focus on that okay so thank you guys so
much for watching make sure to subscribe
for more videos like this and other
videos that I have and like the video if
you guys enjoyed it leave a comment love
to hear what you guys think appreciate
it guys thank you guys so much for
watching talk to you guys again soon
you
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